The dood abides?

The best thing about Prinny 1•2: Exploded and Reloaded, a collection of Prinny: Can I Really Be The Hero? and Prinny 2: Dawn of Operation Panties, Dood!, is that game reviewers are paid by the word. Just that opening sentence has earned enough to buy several Wispa Golds, or your comfort food of choice. And you’ll need comforting after this: a bruising platforming challenge that harks back to the knuckle-rapping disciplinarians of Ghouls ‘n Ghosts and Mega Man.

Alarm bells sound when you spot the life counter: 1000 lives to beat the game. Hit zero and it’s a total reset. And the danger’s confirmed the moment you press jump and feel what kind of acrobatics you’re lumped with. Prinny’s leap is arthritic. There’s no aftertouch to steer him in the air, beyond launching a second, rigid jump, forcing you to commit to every bound. Prinny’s no Mario. It’s more like a platformer starring a goomba. Not just mechanically, but thematically, too: Prinnies are the lowliest henchmen in the Disgaea series.

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